What is ok to say

There was a time when telling the patient that they are about to die, was not ok.

It created the same tragic scene over and over for decades: The families were aware. The patient was not. The families could not say goodbye. Had to keep a straight face. For the sake of the patient, they said.

It took tireless work from Elisabeth Kübler-Ross to change this.

I wonder what "obvious" thing we are not saying to other people. For the sake of them. And I wonder what it would take to go through the stages of making those things, ok to say.